My, oh my, how things change – the deeper I get into my own history and the understanding of how the spiritual realms operate, the greater my realization of what it is that I do not yet know.
As I continue to work on my autobiography, the last chapter about spirituality is the one that needs the most rewriting. I touched on some themes when I was writing that chapter specifically to do with the rape of children, that I now know need further investigation. I already comprehend that child sexual abuse is not about being sexually attracted to children – it is about power.
Why do so many people (mostly men) need to do this in order to feel powerful? What is REALLY going on here?
Spiritual Disconnect: False Power or Abuse (from the chapter “Spiritual Awakening”)
Trigger warning: references to sexual abuse in the following excerpts.
“Those who feel better when they take other people’s energy (or who cannot function in this world without doing so) – are abusive. In essence, they are wounding the souls of others by either chipping away at them slowly over time via multiple abusive acts, or by committing a single act that is so damaging it takes a large chunk of energy leaving a gaping wound in the souls of the victims. There are many ways to carry out such abuse: sexual, physical (e.g. beatings, imprisonment), psychological (e.g. deception, manipulation, incessant criticism) and verbal (e.g. degrading name-calling usually on top of scathing and uncalled for criticism). This is always a false form of empowerment because it does not come from within. It is also temporary which means that this behavior needs to be repeated by abusers for them to continue to feel ‘powerful.’ This may be an acquired state of being because of previous victimization which is explained via the “Cycle of Abuse” theory. (For more on this theory, I refer to my article: Guilt Does Not Change People.) However, this does not apply to many mistreated individuals (like me) who would rather commit suicide than perpetrate the violence that was visited upon them.
This causal theory of abuse is again problematic when it is logically considered because at some point in human history a group of people (or possibly an individual) must have been the first to be abusive. This means that they would not have had any previous experience of victimization which would then make it an inherent (cold-blooded) aspect of their being. (For more on the questionable ‘Cycle of Abuse’ theory, also known as the ‘Abused people abuse people’ theory, I refer you to my article: Excuses for Abuses.)
This inherited characteristic predisposes these people with an inability to empathize with those who suffer. Furthermore, they ‘get off’ on this suffering. Think about it: they will continue to violate another human being even though they can hear and see the pain they are inflicting. These people are not ‘sick’, or simply misguided beings who need some help finding their way back – they are spiritually bankrupt (evil). They protect themselves by planning every facet of the abuse. This includes how they are going to keep it a secret which involves one, or more of the following being visited upon the victims: manipulation, threats, deception, drugging, beating, torture and murder. Such abusers have also learned to shield themselves by hiding in plain sight, which they accomplish by fitting in as much as possible. A perfect example of this in my life was Dvo (a pseudonym for one of my abusers): to the rest of the world, he appeared to be a ‘model’ husband, father, worker, friend, etc. He always had a calm and non-threatening presence which would make anyone believe that I was a pathological liar if I ever disclosed the fact that he was raping me throughout my childhood. These people are cloaked in a veneer of ‘niceness’ where real emotions are not shown because they are not felt. They are essentially “pretending to be human” (this phrase was used in a film about a serial rapist and murderer – it is astonishingly accurate). This is how they fool decent individuals who would, in the very first instance, believe they were being genuine. The most innocent and therefore, easiest people to manipulate in this way, are children.
The abuse of children leads to an increased sense of power for victimizers because of two seemingly contradictory truths: the first being that children are less powerful, or easier to control because of their smaller size and innocence; the second is the fact that they are the most powerful beings because they are more closely connected to Spirit, especially in infancy (this is true before kids are thoroughly conditioned to diminish their power, or disconnect from their real selves in order to fit in).
For those who are so deeply powerless, or devoid of Soul, whatever the reasons, children are an easy target. The sexual exploitation of children is far more damaging to them and empowering for the abusers because sex represents the Life Force itself (i.e. Creation).”
The two paragraphs in blue text are the ones that are most relevant to my need for further inquiry into why this happens AND why the system is complicit in this type of abuse.
As difficult as it is for me to revisit these things, I am in a far better position to do it at this stage of my life. I also understand the Power of The Written Word to Transform Reality. Oh, the sweet, sweet, Power of the Written Word – The Living Word.
It will take a long time to complete this book. I believe the internet will be long gone by that stage. The world will also be a better place where Truth will roam Free and Righteousness will Dwell here for Eternity.
Helen
