I have been exposing the truth about the popular, fallacious definition of ‘forgiveness’ for the majority of my adult life. It began as an instinct that it was wrong. Then, I did some research which revealed that my instincts were correct. I did not know until recently, after doing some further research, that there is a deeper level of deception going on here. To say that I was pissed off after discovering this truth is an understatement. I realized just how insidious the psychological attack on the individual, especially the victimized individual, has become in recent times, specifically the tenets that are peddled in the ‘New Age Movement’. This new information came via two dictionaries (one is almost two-hundred-years-old) that reveal its original, true meaning. If you are as yet unfamiliar with the popular definition of forgiveness in many modern dictionaries, New Age books and the rhetoric of New Age gurus, and some therapists, I will tell you that it is erroneously related to your healing. That is, your ability or willingness to let go of anger, bitterness, hatred etc., in relation to someone who has wronged you. Here is an example of this from a modern dictionary: “Cease to feel angry or bitter towards or about” (The Essential Oxford English Dictionary, 2010). If you are one who has bought this version of ‘forgiveness’, you are about to have your mind blown.
Before I list the definitions, I will explain why I have chosen to add the second, legal definition. The legal one is of the word “condonation” as it is a legal doctrine (this dictionary also includes non-legal words), and contains the word “forgiveness” within its definition. (Forgiveness is not listed on its own in the law dictionary probably because it is already contained within the definition of condonation as they are interchangeable/synonymous terms. You will find further proof of this in a thesaurus. This flies in the faces of those who adhere to the belief that forgiveness does not have anything to do with condonation.)
As a law major at university, I discovered that the law permeates every area of life. Those who enact laws are controlled by those who run the world. So, if they (the world controllers) do not want you to know something because it serves their purposes, they will keep the knowledge from you (i.e. the masses). They do this in various ways – distorting the truth is their main M.O. (modus operandi) – across all areas of society: economics, education, politics, medicine, psychiatry, media, publishing, entertainment, language…
In relation to ‘forgiveness’, the definitions are virtually identical in these two dictionaries – the entry from the latest (2014) version of the law dictionary adheres to the almost-two-hundred-year-old Webster’s definition. The latter also contains legal terms within its definition – “offender”, “crime”, “not guilty”, “pardon”. This makes it even more telling as to the accuracy of the meaning for this word/concept within these dictionaries that are both related to legal justice, and, the extent to which it has been deliberately distorted by those who manufacture popular culture.
“Forgiveness” (noun): 1. the act of forgiving; the pardon of an offender, by which he is considered and treated as not guilty. 2. The pardon or remission of an offense or crime; as the forgiveness of sin or of injuries. 3. Disposition to pardon; willingness to forgive. 4. Remission of a debt, fine or penalty.
Black’s Law Dictionary (Tenth Edition)
“Condonation” (noun): a victim’s express or implied forgiveness of an offense, esp. by treating the offender as if there had been no offense. “Condone” (verb): to voluntarily pardon or overlook. “Condonable” (adjective).
Note that the word “healing”, or phrases such as “letting go of anger or bitterness” are absent from these definitions.
The primary definitions are highlighted in red – read them carefully.
So…forgiveness requires the individual who has been wronged (victim) to treat the wrongdoer (offender) as if s/he has done no wrong (as if there had been no offense) – also known as, DENIAL:
DENIAL, noun (Webster’s Dictionary 1828).
1. An affirmation to the contrary; an assertion that a declaration or fact stated is not true; negation; contradiction. It is often expressed by no or not, simply.
2. Refusal to grant; the negation of a request or petition; the contrary to grant, allowance or concession; as, his request or application met with a direct denial
3. A rejection, or refusing to acknowledge; a disowning; as a denial of God: or a refusing to receive or embrace; as a denial of the faith or the truth.
4. A denial of ones self, is a declining of some gratification; restraint of ones appetites or propensities.
Denial hinders healing for an individual who has been hurt via the actions of another, therefore, forgiveness does not have anything to do with the healing of the one that was harmed. Healing, first and foremost, requires acknowledging the anger (or rage) in relation to the harm done by the offender. Anger keeps all of the other emotions (positive and negative) under wraps. Suppressed anger is the primary cause of depression. Depression is the number one mental health problem in Western countries, and is treated primarily, via pharmaceuticals. But now you also have the self-numbing, meditative techniques and beliefs promulgated by New Age gurus designed to keep a person disconnected from her/his pain. Is it any wonder that the false definition of ‘forgiveness’ requires the denial, or, the suppression of anger? It prevents an individual from healing, especially a severely traumatized or victimized, individual. Anger is also the prime catalyst for social change – this is what the world controllers are really trying to quash. (They are also doing this through the legalization of marijuana, but I digress…) I see how this denial plays out in those around me who claim they have forgiven the worst atrocities but they are screwed up. Yet, many of them will claim that they are ‘happy’ or ‘healed’ – denial on top of denial.
Forgiveness is about not holding the offender accountable for her/his actions, therefore, it benefits the offender. And, God help you if you are like me, and you refuse to let her/him off the hook whilst you are surrounded by a bunch of brainwashed New Agers, therapists, relatives, friends, or, whoever. They will treat you like the offender instead of the one who actually committed the offense. Unbeknownst to them, they are doing the dirty work for the world controllers and they aren’t even being paid for it. Their only reward, as far as I can tell, is an inflated sense of (negative) ego brought on by their (deranged) moral superiority complex.
Some of you will go into denial after discovering the true meaning of forgiveness because, for whatever reason, you want to hold on to the false version of it – that’s your prerogative. If you’re going to get angry with me, at the very least, practise what you preach and ‘forgive’ me for pissing you off with the truth.
Thank you. I often tell people to freely forgive an offender is the same as condoning. This plays right into their hands. Lets them off the hook of justice and accountability. You explained this very well and gave me more clarity to stand against this crazy societal thinking. What you shared isn’t popular at all. Sad to see so much brainwashing. Hard to find well-thought articles anymore.
You are welcome. The thing is, when you quote dictionary definitions about the meaning of forgiveness it is not a matter of belief, or opinion but a matter of FACT. Some people will hold onto the lie because it suits them for one reason or another – not me. When I know the truth, there’s no going back to the lie.
Thank you for this post. I’m so tired of people telling me I must forgive in order to heal. I will NOT forgive those that have not apologized for their bad behavior.
I love how you brought the legal definition into this. It makes so much since.
I have long let go of the hurt and anger, without ever forgiving.
I’ve long held onto the belief that forgiveness is not required for healing. And your post proved my belief. Thank you!